Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

I would like to thank this crazy astronaut lady for ruining my theory that all astronauts are All-Americans. I once posted something about that after the Columbia blowed up.

So when she perishes in a tragedy, Katie Couric can be like, "You might remember Nowak as that crazy bitch who drove to Florida while shitting herself so she could threaten some other lady with a BB gun and a rubber mallet. She was 52."

I didn't know that astronauts wore diapers. Maybe that's why so many little kids want to be astronauts. They've already got that part down. You never think of that, though, when you see astronauts walking to the shuttle, they are wearing diapers that will soon be filled with poop.

What a glorious feeling that must be. To be floating in space and to not have to worry about how your next fart might actually be poop.
All material © Mike Toole; 2003 - 2006