Some crazy guy in my neighborhood just said all of the following to me as I walked past:

"Hey, ese. (I kept walking) Yo, motherfucker. Hey, dickhead! (still walking... pretty far away now). Yo! Hey, MUCHACHO! Ese!"

I am most offended by "muchacho." I'm no muchacho. I'm an hombre, motherfucker.

On the same walk, I saw a guy walking his dog. Some other random dog started barking at the dog. The dog being walked did nothing. The guy walking him, however, started barking back.

This was a fun walk. Nice job with the crazy, neighborhood.