I was recently speaking with my friend Alisa about New Year's. Here was our conversation.

Alisa: What are you doing for New Year's?
Me: I don't know. No plans, really.
Alisa: We don't know either.
Me: Last year we just stayed in and made dinner and got kind of drunk. That was nice.
Alisa: That's always good. Eat some dinner, drink wine, watch some dick.
Me: Watch some what?
Alisa: Watch some dick.
Me: (Just staring at her like I've just learned something incredibly new and shocking about her.)
Alisa: You know, Dick's Rockin' Eve?
Mike: Ohhhh. I thought it would be weird that you and Rick would watch gay porn on New Year's.

So anyway, this year I am totally watching gay porn.

Hey, how have you been? I'm fine. Getting used to the Cleve. Every girl here is named some form of Katherine.

Oh, I forgot to post the best picture I had from vacation. You know how on a cruise the person who makes up your room will often make the towels look like some sort of animal like a dog or something? On our first night, we got what I believe to be a vagina.



There were some eyeball stickers somewhere on here, but I took those off. Because vaginas don't have eyes. Tania says it was supposed to be a walrus or something. I don't buy that. Maybe a walrus vagina.

Someone at work today was talking about a press release being put out by this publishing company, which had published Gerald Ford's last book. It wasn't a new book. So he said, "They are just trying to ride the wave of his death." Now I want to start a band called The Gerald Ford Death Wave. I really need to learn how to play an instrument.