Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before

Monday, December 19, 2005


Oh man, who else is excited for Wednesday?? After two long years of waiting, Cheaper by the Motherfuckin' Dozen 2 is coming out! I don't know if you saw the commercial yet, but Steve Martin gets his balls crushed on a log! Who isn't laughing yet?!?!?!

I can't wait until the trilogy is complete, but then there will be that depressing following year when you realize there won't be another Cheaper by the Dozen (CBTD) film. I went through the same thing with Lord of the Rings. So I will be all bummed out and put in the CBTD DVD to watch the special features. I hope there is an extended Steve Martin Getting His Balls Smashed on a Log scene.

Speaking of movies that remind me of craps that I've taken, I watched Mr. and Mrs. Smith last night. What a steaming pile. It was barely a movie. It should have been called Two Hot People Blowing Shit Up. There was hardly a plot, and everyone in the movie (including Brad and Angelina) just seemed to be like, "Hey, I'm in a movie with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie! This movie practically makes itself!"

You know what might make it more interesting? A commentary by Jennifer Aniston. Just listen to her watching the movie, saying most of the time, "You bitch. Slut. (low audible sobbing) Whore!"

Remember when Brad Pitt acted in movies? Like Seven and Twelve Monkeys and even True Romance. Now he just "cools" instead of acts. "Hey, I'm Brad Pitt and I'm in a movie and I'm hot and I kind of talk with a mush-mouth, but I don't care because I just fucked Angelina Jolie and somehow made eight million dollars while doing it."

Anyway, I originally was going to give the movie two stars on Netflix, but the more I thought about it, it got knocked down to 1 measly little star. Take that, Hollywood and your lazy movie-making! I'm fighting back via Netflix stars.

Hey, to those of you that signed up for that notify list thing on the left there, does it work??? I kind of just threw that up there without knowing if it actually works. I hope you are being notified of this bloggy goodness.
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