I urge everyone to follow the ongoing launch delay of the space shuttle Discovery. Why? Because you should want to be doing something cool when it eventually blows up. So when people ask you in the future if you remember where you were when the Discovery blew up, you can have a better story than the one you had for the last two.

Here is a history of where I was and where I will be.

Where were you when the Challenger blew up?

I was home from school because it was a snow day. I was watching Scrabble when they came in with a special report.

Hm, not that much fun. Not a great story.

Where were you when the Columbia blew up?

I was actually sleeping off a hangover when my sister called to tell me. It was weird because the night before we were talking about the Challenger.

Again, not an interesting place to be, although it was quite odd and coincidental that we'd been talking about the Challenger.

Where were you when the Discovery blew up?

I was jerking off on to a picture of the pope.

Holy shit.

Yeah, I know. Weird, right?

Which pope?

The old one. You know, the real one.

Why were you doing that.

So I'd have an interesting story to tell you when you asked me that question.

Well done!

So whenever they get this thing off the ground, make sure you are doing something. But don't jerk off on a picture of the pope. That's mine!