Do me a favor. If I ever die in a car accident, please make sure that my family doesn't start one of those side of the road memorials. You know, with the cross, the teddy bears, probably my Mets hat. Shit like that. It's fucking gay. Yes, it is gay to die in a car accident.

I thought of this as I was driving down to my mom's for Mother's Day. It was a nice day. Went to breakfast, then lazied up the house for a while. My parents watched Office Space on Comedy Central. I haven't heard my mom laugh like that at a movie since we saw the Three Amigos. She also really liked Fletch.

My mom is bad at watching movies. She usually falls asleep or talks on the phone. I remember one time I was making her watch a movie, I forget what, but for the first 25 minutes she was talking to my sister. Then she watched for two minutes and said, "I don't know. I just can't get into this movie."

My dad fucking loves Spaceballs. It's the only DVD he ever bought. I saw it with him in the theater and he laughed from the beginning to end. He also laughed during the Three Amigos. I remember seeing that movie in a packed theater with my parents and my friend Brian McManus (I think he was Irish), and we were the only ones laughing. We all agreed after the movie that everyone else in the theater were idiots. I've got that one on DVD. Acutally, I think it's Doug's. Well, either way, I'm taking it when I move out.