The other day I was in Manhattan, and while I was there, I thought, Hey, lemme call Kat and see what she's doing. It seems to be so rare that I'm ever in Manhattan anymore, so I'd like to spend as much time as possible there. So I call Kat, and this conversation happens:

Kat: Hey.

Me: Hey.

Kat: What's up?

Me: Well, I'm actually in Manhattan and wanted to see if maybe you wanted to get a drink or something.

Kat: Oh... well, I'm actually going out for drinks. You should totally come.

Me: Where are you going?

Kat: Um, Mars 2112.

Me: Are you serious?

Kat: Yes. Apparently they have a really good happy hour.

Me: Hmm.

Kat: So are you coming?

Me: I'm not sure.


For those of you not familiar with Mars 2112, it is a tourist trap restaurant near Times Square with a Mars theme. It's like eating and drinking on Mars. My old office is right around the corner from the place, and it was always kind of a joke. Whenever people discussed where to go for happy hour, Mars 2112 was brought up, but only in jest.

For Kat, though, this was no joke. So once I got passed my high-falootin' thoughts of "I would never go to Mars 2112" I decided that it would at least be a unique experience. And it most certainly was.

First, Kat was right. They do have a good happy hour. Two dollar beers. You don't find things like that anywhere in Manhattan, especially midtown. And it also leads to great jokes like, "Hey, the exchange rate on Mars is great!" There were many Mars jokes throughout the eve, none of which I can recall right now. As I was walking there, I did think that it would be funny to say, "Hey, what happens on Mars, stays on Mars." Kat's friend Morgan beat me to it.

The place was pretty crowded with people who seemed kind of ashamed to be at Mars 2112, but proud that they found a happy hour with two dollar beers.

I think it's safe to say that the next time I get the chance, I will be headed back to Mars.

I would also like to thank Kat for answering her phone with a "Hey," which signifies she knows it is me. Being that we all have cell phones, and names show up when people call, I can't stand it when people still answer with a classic response of "Hello?" Because then you have to be like, "Hey, it's Mike. You know, the guy whose name just showed up on your cell phone when you looked at it before you answered it. Yeah, that's me." Of course there will be numbers that show up which you don't know, but for the most part, you should almost always be answering with a "Hey, I know who you are so don't bother identifying yourself; we can just skip that" rather than a "Hello? (pause so the person can identify themselves, even though I already know who it is, but I'm such a dick that I like to make the other person awkwardly say that it's them, even though they know that I know that it's them)."

Thanks Kat. And fuck you to everyone else. Yes, even you!