Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before

Tuesday, December 28, 2004


This morning on CNN, the anchor lady was talking to the weatherman, and for some reason she showed him the cover of the New York Times, which has a picture of a mother weeping over the bodies of her dead children. The weatherman said, "Hmm, oh my. They probably couldn't swim very well."

No shit.

I think we can all agree that the bulk of this disaster could have been avoided, not if a warning system was in place, but if the kids had swimming lessons. Thank you, CNN weatherman.

In his defense, I don't think he was expecting her to bring that up. He was probably all ready to be like, "It is chilly in the northeast." And not, "My God, this tragedy makes me realize my life is worthless."

I had to leave for work before she could talk to the entertainment reporter. "Before we get to What's Hot in 2005, I wanted to show you this picture of the Holocaust. Isn't that something? So many children. Look at how sad their faces are."

"Um, yeah, look at that. I guess they weren't, um, good workers. Can I talk about crazy celebrity baby names now?"

Anyway, here are some more three questions from a lady named Trinity.

1. What is your favorite ice cream flavor?

I'm very boring when it comes to ice cream. I like the classics. Strawberry is tops. Yeah, that's right, I like pink ice cream. This, of course, adds to my dad's theory that I'm gay.

2. Why did you pick three random questions and not 1, 2, or 5?

Because I've seen other people do it on their blogs. OK, so I'm unoriginal, I accept it. Damn, Trinity, was the point of your email to make me feel like shit, unoriginal and gay? Mission accomplished.

3. What was your favorite age and if you didn't have it yet, what do you think your favorite age will be?

For some reason, 23 stands out. I don't know why. I think I just like the number. Nineteen was pretty great. I'm sure two was a lot of fun, but I don't recall much. Probably lots of crapping and sleeping and giggling.
All material © Mike Toole; 2003 - 2006