Will someone let this man take a fucking nap?


OK, John. You like sports. We get it.


"One time, I went to a zoo, and this monkey was like, "SHREEEIKKKK! SHREEEIKKKK!"


"Five more years! What? Oh. Four more years!"


All rise for President Plastic Man.


"And now I'd like to do an impression of a choir boy. Oh Holy Niiiiiggggghhhhhtt!!!..."

or

"Dear God. I want to be president again. And, um, I want a new pony. And a cowboy hat. And bless my mom and my dad. And ..."


"Someone get over here and hold my wife upright!"


"Heh heh. It's like a real person. Only it's kinda little!"