In case you didn't get to follow the RNC this week, here is a quick recap:

9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Bush! Bush! Bush! 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Bush is great. 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Rudy! 9/11 9/11 9/11 Arnold! 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Bush twins are hot. 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 But they're stupid. 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Bush on a pile of rubble with a fireman. 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Hero. 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Bush. 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Four more years! 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11.

There was no mention of that one guy. Oh, what's his name? Tip of my tongue... Oh yeah! Osama bin Laden! Remember that guy?! His fifteen minutes came and went pretty fast, huh? He reminds me of Ricky Martin or Naughty by Nature.

Bush's speech was a snoozefest until the end where he started crying like a little bitch. If I was a conspiracy theorist, I would have guessed that was one of those animatronic presidents from Disney's Hall of Presidents. In case you missed it, Bush started talking about the sacrifices soldiers have made, including the ultimate sacrifice, and he appeared to get a little teary eyed. It was quite unexpected and human. It probably swung a couple of votes his way.

The rest of the speech though, was more of a "this is what I will do for the next four years," but like most convention speeches, no plans on how to do it.

The first thing he said that made me cringe was when he said he believes in a government that enriches its citizens' lives, but does "not try to run their lives." Except of course for the gays and the lesbians.

The clapping and cheering was, as usual, way over the top. They just cheered everything. Even when he plugged his web site, there was an inordinate amount of cheering. "Wooo! Web site! URLs are awesome!" One thing about Kerry's speech was that he did a pretty good job in shutting everyone up. He didn't let them take over. Nothing is more boring than watching a boring speech broken up by clapping and idiots in stupid hats waving flags.

When he started to talk about terrorism and the war on terror, he said, "You know where I stand." I was hoping he'd follow that up with, "So let's just skip all that." So he talked for a long time about all that fun war stuff.

He mentioned how Kerry and Edwards "saw the threat" and both voted for the war. Yes, they saw the threat based on the shitty intelligence. We've been down this road, right?

So anyway, the bush twins are good looking gals, but did anyone catch their speech the other night? Ugh, it was terrible. It was like they were 12 years old and rehearsing for a school play. An incredibly retarded school play. There was some joke about how their parents do know the difference between Bono and mono. Wha? Is that the best their writers could come up with? How about some jokes about when your dad was an alcoholic and he beat the shit out of your mom. That would be hilarious.

Politics shmolitics.

Speaking of alcoholics, I am off to Penn State for the weekend to watch some football and drink some beverages. I am just getting over being sick, so this is probably not the smartest idea, but I committed to going. I guess I could not drink, but I think that would be even more stupid. Have you ever tried to be sober around 100,000 drunk people? Not fun.

So happy Labor Day. Don't do anything laborious.