Below are two photos of what I can see when I turn around in my office. This is why I would rather not work in Jersey City. I like my view. I like my office. I like going to Central Park on my lunch break. I like the options I have for lunch. In Jersey City there is a food court. That's about all. They have a deli and a grill. The usual stuff. And a pasta bar call Pasta-bilities. That's a fucking play on words. I like pasta and I like puns, but I'd rather stay up here on the 32nd floor.

Photo 1, which has some sunflowers in the foreground. A fella in my office organized the sunflower experiment. They are behind me because this window gets the most sun. It's fun to watch the progress of these flowers. Did you know that in Jersey City, flowers have been known to commit suicide? It's true. Look it up.

Photo 2 is an unobstructed view. Up on the left is a little known structure called the Empire State Building. It's tall. If you look in the middle, you can see the huge Puff Daddy billboard. Every morning, I imitate him and show him my fist and say, "What up, Puff? Have a good night? Me too. How was Times Square last night? Quiet? Yeah, right! OK, Puffy, I'm going to get to work. If you need anything, just tap me on my shoulder. What's that? Sorry, but I'll never call you P. Diddy. You'll always be Puffy to me. I'm sorry, what? No, you MY nigga!"

I'm going to miss Puffy.