Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before

Friday, February 06, 2004

I don't have much of an opinion on the death penalty, but this motherfucker in Florida should be killed. I often tend to sympathize with anyone who is being killed, including criminals, but I wouldn't give a hoot if they put this guy down. How do you kill an eleven-year-old girl? How?

At first I thought, Feed him to the lions!!! But that's too easy. Lions would kill him too quick. Feed him to the crabs. Feed him to the fire ants. Feed him to something that is going to take a long time. But not starving kittens, because that would be so cute! Imagine watching someone getting the death penalty, and everyone going, "Awwww."

Anyway. Back to Janet Jackson! Some dipshit is suing Janet, Justin, CBS, MTV and Viacom for "sexually explicit conduct" by the performers, which caused millions of people to "suffer outrage, anger, embarrassment and serious injury."

Serious injury? The only one to be injured in this whole thing seems to be Janet's nipple, which had to wear that big metal shield, yet you don't hear anyone talking about the negative effect on the nipple. Won't someone please think of the nipple!
All material © Mike Toole; 2003 - 2006