|Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before|
Monday, December 29, 2003
Anyway, here are some predictions for the year 2004, in no particular order:
-- I will turn 29.
-- I will be hungover on January 1.
-- I will get Cat Stevens to sing "The Wind" at my funeral, even though he will be responsible for my death.
-- Howard Dean will win the Democratic nomination.
-- I will not vote for Howard Dean.
-- Howard Dean will come off as such a doofus during the debates, I will become a staunch Republican and run for the City Council under the War for Everyone! platform.
-- I will lose the election and realize that war isn't much of a deciding factor when people vote for City Council.
-- I will attempt to rejuvenate my career when I kiss Britney Spears on national television.
-- No one sees it because everyone is watching the season finale of The O.C.
-- While at work, I will mutter underneath my breath, "I fucking hate this place."
-- While at work, I will say aloud, "I fucking hate this place!"
-- When people ask me how my New Year's was, I'll reply, "Pretty good."
-- While at work, someone will complain to me about our job. I will reply, "This place ain't so bad."
-- George Bush will accidentally dial the wrong number when conceding the election to the winner. The number he dials is my cell phone. I will graciously accept his congratulations on behalf of our new president, Miss Oprah Winfrey.
-- I will offer to conference in Oprah. The president replies, "No. Just let her know I called."
-- Pudge Rodriguez will get to my web site by searching "Pudge Urbina kiss".
-- My sister will get me a George Foreman Grill for Christmas. I will get her George Foreman.
-- I will win the Nobel Prize for Blogging, but it will be taken away when the voting committee finds out that Desmond Tutu has a blog at http://deztoot.blogspot.com.
-- Someone will send me an email asking to "Check out my nude pics". I will not check out their nude pics.
-- I will be on The Price is Right and win the Showcase Showdown and will win an all expenses paid trip to Paris.
-- I will be nervous on this flight.