Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before

Friday, September 05, 2003

I don't know if anyone saw the NFL kickoff thing the other night with performances from Britney, Mary J, and Aerosmith, but it got me thinking. Aerosmith totally should have died in a plane crash in 1979. Actually, right after they wrote and recorded Sweet Emotion, they should have died. For me, that's the only song of theirs I won't turn off if I hear it on the radio. And now, just seeing Steven Tyler running around somehow looking older than Mick Jagger is just sad. And all they do is keep pumping out the rock ballads that will end up being in the next Jerry Bruckheimer movie.

I think once a year the American public should be allowed to vote for a band that gets to die in a plane crash. Perhaps the Strokes should be the next band to do so. It's the perfect time for them. They are about to release their next album which will probably be loved by all the critics, despite the fact there's nothing too original on it, but they'll never be bigger than they are right now. Go out on top, boys.

As much as I love them, U2 should have died in 1992 right after Achtung Baby. We would have heard that album and been like, "Whoa, this album is so good. Imagine what else they could have done." Would anyone really be that bummed if they never got to hear Zooropa?

Limp Bizkit should have died in 1993, just before they formed their band, which would have required four or five separate plane crashes. I guess that's too much carnage. Maybe just Fred Durst's plane could crash. It would be great if some of the debris from the plane would have landed on Matchbox 20 and Nickelback.

I really don't want all of these people to die. I love everyone.
All material © Mike Toole; 2003 - 2006