The other night I was out with my friend Anise, and there was this guy at the bar, who kept staring at us. He obviously wanted in on our conversation, because we are so fucking interesting. I am not opposed to talking to strangers, despite what my parents taught me as a boy, but this guy was just annoying. He was just staring, waiting for us to talk to him. Finally he started talking to us and gave Anise a lei. Apparently he was in Hawaii earlier in the night. He then said something like, "I've had such a terrible night." He wanted us to say, "Awww, what happened there, fella?" But neither of us were really interested. Here was our conversation.

Guy: Sorry to bother you, but I just wanted to give you this. (Places the lei around Anise's neck)
Anise: Thanks.
(AWKWARD SILENCE)
Guy: I've had a terrible night.
Me and Anise (both nodding): Oh. Huh.
Guy: Yeah, it's just been really bad.
Anise: What happened?
Guy: Just about everything.
Me: Before you go any further, no one you know died, right? I wouldn't know how to handle that.
(Guy just stares at me. Now I'm thinking, "Fuck, someone did die." Turns out no one died, though. He was King of Drama.)
Guy: No. But I've felt like killing myself tonight.
(More awkward silence)
Anise: Hey, the night is still young!
( I laughed hysterically and the guy turned back to his beer. He left after about twenty minutes and after he saw Anise take off the lei.)
Anise (as the guy was leaving): Damn. I'll feel bad if that guy kills himself.

Are we terrible people? I don't know, but that dude was annoying.