|Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before|
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
Have fun in your cubicle. I will be WELDING.
That guy really likes welding. But even though melting shit with fire does seem like fun, I imagine it would - like any job - get boring after a while. So when I get bored at work, I can check out awesome things on the internet like this amazing synopsis of Warren G and Nate Dogg's Regulate. I bet your welding equipment doesn't have Wikipedia.
I can also check out the Wikipedia entry for Welding.
Anyway, I was thinking of other jobs that would make good bumper stickers like that one. So here's a fun game for you to play. Match the job with the bumper sticker.
Guard at Guantanamo
Have fun in your cubicle. I will be WATERBOARDING SUSPECTED TERRORISTS.
Have fun in your cubicle. I will be PERFORMING LATE TERM ABORTIONS.
Have fun in your cubicle. I will be MASTURBATING.
Have fun in your cubicle. I will be IN THE CUBICLE NEXT TO YOU.
Have fun in your cubicle. I will be MAKING CUBICLES.
Yes, this was tricky, as the MASTURBATING one could have been a match for all of them. But if you really paid attention, you could figure it out.
Anyway, I think I am going make my own bumper sticker: Have fun welding. I will be FINDING RANDOM ARTICLES ON WIKIPEDIA WHILST IN MY CUBICLE.
Last night I was at a concert, and this girl behind me answers her phone while the concert is going on. Here is what I hear:
Hello. What? I can't hear you. I can't HEAR YOU. WHAT? I'm at a concert. You're breaking up. YOUR PHONE IS BREAKING UP. I CAN'T HEAR YOU. WHAT? I WILL CALL YOU LATER.
If I was the friend who called that girl, we would no longer be friends. But I hope that this is what was being said on the other side of that call:
Hey. How's it- Where are you?
I said where are you. It's really loud.
I can't hear you.
Well, call me ba-
I can't HEAR YOU.
I SAID CALL ME BACK.
WHAT? I'm at a concert.
Well, then why the fuck are you answering your phone?
You're breaking up.
What? You answered the phone at a CONCERT, and you're blaming my phone?
YOUR PHONE IS BREAKING UP.
Yeah, I heard you, but it's your ear that is the problem because of all the noise around you, you dolt.
I CAN'T HEAR YOU. WHAT?
I CALLED YOU A DOLT! WHY WOULD YOU ANSWER YOUR PHONE AT A CONCERT, YOU IMBECILE?
I WILL CALL YOU LATER.
No, please don't do that. We really shouldn't be friends anymore.
People are so stupid.
Anyway, if you are in a cubicle and have some time to kill, this slideshow of the world's strangest airports is awesome.